Film review: Raceto Witch Mountain | Alien remake Disney quite cut it

Published on Friday 3 April 2009 16:34

RACE TO WITCH MOUNTAIN (PG) Director: Andy Fickman Running time: 98 minutes

THE UNFLAGGINGLY charismatic Dwayne Johnson, the artist formerly known as The Rock, may not be your first choice when it comes to saving the world, but Race To Witch Mountain suggests that if Tom Cruise or Vin Diesel are busy, he can fill in. Here he stars as Jack, a surly but goodhearted taxi driver in Las Vegas with useful experience as a getaway driver for the Mob, who picks up two teenagers (Alexander Ludwig and AnnaSophia Robb).

They actually pick him up, in a sense, because they're brother and sister aliens from outer space, who speak in an awkward, formal diction that could have been written by M Night Shyamalan. "It is important we gain much distance from this location," one of them tells Jack, instead of the time-honoured "Let's get out of here." It also turns out they have superpowers, although nothing that can upgrade a dodgy film script. Boy alien can walk through walls while girl alien is able to levitate objects and read minds; and if they don't get back to their spaceship, Earth will be destroyed.

Understandably, they are also being pursued by government agents led by the steel-eyed Ciarn Hinds, plus an alien assassin who can wipe out flanks of soldiers with a couple of blasts but prefers to engage Las Vegas taxi drivers in mano-a-mano combat.

Well, I say understandably, but really you shouldn't expect this film to make sense, just believe that it is fast-paced and that there are guns, explosions, car chases and punches, but no bloodshed. After all, this is Disney and Race To Witch Mountain is a "renewed" version of the studio's 1975 kids' adventure Escape To Witch Mountain.

Much like the original Witch Mountain, Race harks back to the days when Disney knocked out wholesome family fun films for Easter, summer and Christmas. Give or take a couple of one-liners, a tedious environmental lecture, better special effects and the much faster pace (about half the film takes place in Johnson's cab), it wouldn't be hard to imagine this having been released in 1975. The child actors from the Seventies original, Ike Eisenmann and Kim Richards, even pop up here in cameo roles; she's a waitress who tries to help the children slip away from the feds, and he is a sheriff who refuses to be steamrollered by armed outsiders.

What distinguishes Race To Witch Mountain is Dwayne Johnston, who is wryly fun and self-deprecating in films. Here he ditches the pink tutu from last autumn's Game Plan and gets back to what he's built to do: kicking serious butt. During this film, I started to develop a crush on Dwayne; he's big without seeming monstrous and can deliver lines like "go, Go, GO" without ever looking bored. The latter is a triumph of acting and feeling, given how bad some of the dialogue is in Race To Witch Mountain, although admittedly this is like going to a strip bar and complaining about the lack of ice in your drink.

On general release from Friday