A strange week: Christopher Mackie on the news you may have missed
Boot camp fitness, Thai-style
HE IS a military hero in Thailand following a series of daring covert missions during the Cold War, and once threatened to quash anti-government protests by dropping snakes on activists from helicopters.
But now the Thai army's most celebrated, and maverick, officer has been redeployed – as an aerobics instructor.
Major-General Khattiya Sawasdipol, also known as Seh Daeng, is furious after being ordered to lead a series of public fitness dances in the marketplaces of Bangkok.
"It is ridiculous to send me, a warrior, to dance at markets," he said, perhaps worried about how he will look in camouflage-print Lycra workout gear.
"The army chief wants me to be a presenter leading aerobics dancers," he said. "I have prepared one dance. It's called the 'throwing-a-hand-grenade' dance."
Cheer up, cheer up
THE use of antidepressants is on the rise, and not even our friends in the animal kingdom are escaping the trend.
This week, a depressed parrot called Fred was prescribed an avian equivalent of Prozac to help him perk up after the death of his owner.
Fred has been under the weather for nine months, causing him to bite his own feathers off and bob his head up and down constantly.
Ballsy move from medic
MIGHT the song favoured by the British during the Second World War have been correct? Could Hitler have indeed been burdened with half of the normal male testicular quotient?
Yes, according to German First World War medic Johan Jambor, who reportedly told a priest that the future Fhrer had lost the spherical organ during the Battle of the Somme. Sadly, he could not confirm whether it had been retained and later exhibited in the Albert Hall.
Nasa in a web of confusion
THEY employ some of the world's most sophisticated technology, yet it seems Nasa scientists are no match for the humble house spider – one of the arachnids sent to the International Space Station last week has escaped from its enclosure.
Astronauts said they believed the male spider had sneaked into the female's tank, but couldn't be sure – the female is so confused by zero gravity, she has filled her enclosure with web to stop herself floating.
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- Craig Levein insists Scotland will recover from US thrashing
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Weather for Edinburgh
Monday 28 May 2012
Today
Sunny spells
Temperature: 9 C to 22 C
Wind Speed: 15 mph
Wind direction: North east
Tomorrow
Cloudy
Temperature: 10 C to 16 C
Wind Speed: 10 mph
Wind direction: North east

