Joke of the Day
Joke of the Day
Joke of the day
A man went into a restaurant which was offering a fixed-menu, three-course meal. When the waiter brought the first course, the man tasted it and said: "What is this?''
Joke of the day
My husband and I were sitting at a table at my 20th anniversary secondary school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink, as he sat alone at a nearby table.
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Joke of the Day
Three buddies die in a car crash, and they find themselves at the pearly gates.
Joke of the Day
An English cat, named One Two Three and a French cat, named Un Deux Trois, decided to have a swimming race across the Channel. The English cat won because Un Deux Trois cat sank.
Joke of the Day
Why did the nurse tip-toe to the cupboard?
Joke of the Day
Did you hear about the cross-eyed headmaster?
Joke of the Day
John comes back quite late from a day at the golf course and his wife asks: "What kind of time do you call this?"
Joke of the Day
What does Captain Jack Sparrow cook stew in?
Joke of the Day
A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and announces: "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."
Joke of the Day
A match between two junior teams was about to take place but it had been raining so heavily all week that the ground resembled a swamp.
Joke of the Day
An explorer walked into a clearing and was surprised to see a pigmy standing beside a huge dead elephant. "Did you kill that?" he asked. The pigmy answered: "Yes".
Joke of the Day
A bloke went to his mate's fancy dress party with nothing but a naked girl on his back.
Joke of the Day
What do you get if you cross a skunk with a koala?
Joke of the Day
What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?
Joke of the Day
What's white and if it fell out of a tree would kill you?
Joke of the Day
Two goldfish are in their tank.
Joke of the Day
A woman is talking to her husband. She asks: "If I died, would you meet someone else?"
Joke of the Day
How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?
Joke of the Day
How do you tell a kebab to be quiet?
Joke of the Day
A husband and wife at a hotel asked for a 6am alarm call. On the stroke of 6, the phone rang and a voice said: "This is your wake-up call." The guest said thanks and put the phone down. A minute later the phone rang again and the voice said: "This is your wake-up call." Annoyed, the husband said: "You phoned only a minute ago." "I know," replied the receptionist, "but there are two of you."
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Weather for Edinburgh
Friday 24 May 2013
Today
Sunny spells
Temperature: 3 C to 12 C
Wind Speed: 18 mph
Wind direction: North east
Tomorrow
Sunny
Temperature: 7 C to 17 C
Wind Speed: 13 mph
Wind direction: West
