Today . . .

WE are having our big summer party tonight at the Roxy, Assembly’s big new venue, which they bought last year.

HE ROARED up to our lunch table, crash helmet under his arm. “I’ve just robbed a bank. I’ve left the bike at the door.’’ Norrie Rowan. Who else? As well that eavesdroppers at the next table were promptly reassured.

WITH a name like mine, it was inevitable that my schooldays would involve much sniggering at roll call and “hilarious” comments from classmates.

BANKERS don’t get a lot of good press – so credit where it’s due to RBS director of agriculture, Craig Dickson. After raising £9000 last year, he’s leading a triathlon challenge at the Royal Highland Show to raise cash for charities supporting struggling farmers.

TRY as I might, I cannot share in the outrage caused by the revelation that the United States Federal government was snooping on its own citizens and just about everybody else by accessing the records of internet companies.

MAKE no mistake, this is a bleak day not just for sport in Edinburgh, but for the city as a whole.

THE fact that people are living longer is a good thing, but many of our older people will be living with long-term conditions. We also know that the number of people with dementia is expected to double over the next 25 years.

Today . . .

IT has been described as the best thing since sliced bread – and the Naked Student Cookbook is causing a stir in the culinary world after Edinburgh University students posed naked across the Capital.

PUT on a spurt for Burt. You want to see Bacharach in the flesh. Seats for his Usher Hall concert on Saturday week are selling fast, his publicists assure me. As they would. And remember, he’s cracking. There’ll come a time when raindrops stop falling on his head.

LAST month, 85 per cent of us received a nuisance call of one type or another, with some unlucky souls receiving as many as 50 calls in the course of four weeks.

I COULDN’T swear that Samuel Pepys referred to dog poo in his 17th century diary of London life, but it wouldn’t surprise me. It’s more than 40 years since I started in journalism and it’s always been a major concern among readers of every paper I’ve ever worked for.

THERE has been much debate about the decision to allow 16-year-olds the vote in next year’s referendum.

The correct use of grammar? Who cares? This seems to be a typical comment in response to recent media pieces related to the subject.

Dog fouling is on the increase again but everyone can help rid us of this scourge, says Keep Scotland Beautiful boss Derek Robertson

They are the backbone of the NHS. The doctors, nurses, and consultants who save lives every day with hardly a word of recognition.

YOU may recall that last week, in this column, I was saying the UK festival scene is facing some stiff competition from overseas events, with many music lovers opting instead to mix a bit of foreign travel and sunshine in with their festival experiences.

So what’s it to be? Your choice of music. I mean, it’s your funeral after all, and don’t tell me it hasn’t crossed your mind. Marie Curie Cancer Care have done a survey and it’s still Sinatra’s My Way favourite the pick of the funereal pops.

THE creation of Police Scotland has not changed how local police tackle local issues and in fact has given us greater ability through extra policing resource to respond to local needs.