11 of the best quotes from Scottish Rugby history

11 of the best quotes from Scottish Rugby history

11 of the best quotes from Scottish Rugby history

Despite being a sport “played by hooligans”, as the old saying goes, rugby stars throughout the years have shown themselves to be more than capable of coming up with a witty observation or two. Besides, as the old saying continues, the game is “watched by gentlemen”, who’ve also chipped in with some memorable quotes from time to time. One commentator, in particular, was famous for the way he would turn a phrase.

After Scottish international John Jeffrey had dropped the Calcutta Cup following a 1988 victory over England, Bob Munro quipped…

“It will now have to be called the Calcutta Shield.”

Legendary Scottish centre Joseph McPartlin on his successors in the Oxford University backs…

“I’ve seen better centres in a box of Black Magic.”

Former Scottish international Norman Mair, who would go on work as a journalist for The Scotsman, wrote in 1988…

“Wade Dooley: With a handle like that he sounds more like a western sheriff than the Lancashire bobby that he is.”

Favourite of the 80s and 90s Gavin Hastings giving a blunt assessment of New Zealand star Jonah Lomu…

“There’s no doubt about it, he’s a big ba***rd.”

Said by French rugby player Pierre Berbizier following Scottish accusations of foul play after a 1995 Five Nations encounter…

“If you can’t take a punch, you should play table tennis.”

When you think of the best quotes in Scottish Rugby there is one man who comes to mind: the legendary commentator Bill McLaren.

On Jonah Lomu…

“I’m no hod carrier but I would be laying bricks if he was running at me.”

On Welsh wing Gerald Davies…

“His sidestep was marvellous – like a shaft of lightning.”

When describing a particularly bad kick…

“He kicked that ball like it were three pounds o’ haggis.”

Asked to describe the best thing about being a commentator for 50 years, he gave a typically Scottish response…

“I’ve hardly ever had to pay to get in.”

On a particularly hefty punt…

“My goodness, that wee ball’s gone so high there’ll be snow on it when it comes down.”

On French international Andre Venter…

“He’s no oil painting, but look at him working the blind side like a pop-up toaster!”

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